Benign
by HeyBulldogProductions
Summary: Upon discovering a blemish on his neck that could very well be cancerous, Barney makes a life altering decision. He sees the road he wants to go down and the one he should go down. So...which one will he persue? Avenue Quinn? Or Avenue Robin? Set around mid-season 8
1. Welcome to the party, pal

**Benign**

Chapter 1: Welcome to the party, pal

Barney once again sat at the usual booth. Conversation tonight amongst the group was lathered with news about Ted's not-so-new girlfriend, Victoria. Even a short verse of 'bang bang bangity bag' rang out once. As the rest of the group chatted, Barney just stared into his scotch and felt a little lost. Every once in a while, he'd throw out a chuckle or say something inappropriate to feel more with it. But it was nearing midnight and the fatigue overcame him. The sides of his mouth perked as he brought the glass up to his lip and swallowed the last mouthful of his drink.

"I'm hittin' the hay early tonight," he announced somberly, putting a few bills down on the table.

"Awww come on, Barney. Marshall and I are supposed to be the ones leaving early," Lily said as she held her glass of wine to her lips.

"Usually, I would. But Quinn has some wedding appointment early in the morning and if I miss it she's withdrawing sex for a day!" Barney sounded like a child that got denied ice cream before bed.

Ted laughed. "Come on, dude. You can go a day without sex. Sit down and have at least another scotch. The night is y-…" Ted got a text. "…I have to go," he said getting up from the table.

"Booty call?" Robin teased, swirling her scotch around in the glass.

"…Yeah. Normally, I wouldn't just leave you guys like this, but since you're all either engaged or married, I figure that sex outranks drinks with friends."

Robin raised her hand up slightly. "Ummm…I'm not married or engaged…I'm all alone. But thanks for singling me out, Ted," she smirked and drank.

"Sorry, Robin," he apologized before leaving the bar with his coat in hand.

Barney started. "Well if he gets to leave-"

"Nope! No one else at this table gets to have sex tonight," she said. Marshall kind of whimpered, but Lily ignored it. "Barney, order another scotch and keep your ass in that booth for…'til one o'clock," Lily ordered, looking at her phone clock.

"Fine, but you have to break the news to little Barnicle about not visiting his 'little friend' tomorrow if I sleep in."

"Last time you said that, you pushed my wife's face in your crotch and tried to make her give 'little Barnicle' a kiss," Marshall spat, drinking his beer. Barney had accepted his defeat and had another scotch hailed over to the table.

Another hour of chatter went by before Marshall and Lily left to relieve the sitter of watching baby Marvin. Barney contemplated leaving too, but Robin was still at the bar alone. When he got up, she didn't say a word. She figured he was leaving too, but didn't bother to stop him from going home. He had someone there. She had nothing but Netflix. Her facial expression looked especially surprised when he returned with two scotches. He paused in mid-step to meet her gaze with a soft one of his own. Handing her the glass, he sat opposite of her and smiled.

"A bro never leaves another bro hanging," he quoted in a hushed voice, throwing a wink Robin's way. She smiled and took a drink of her scotch. Her face lit up with pleasure.

"Canadian?" she questioned. Barney nodded and even let out a chuckle.

"Got the same for myself. I figured 'what the hell?' Like that song by that Drake guy said: you only live once. As much as I hate to admit this, the one-quarter Canadian part of me quenched the thirst."

She raised her glass. "Welcome to the party, pal."

Barney stopped in mid-drink to look at Robin. "Did you just quote _Die Hard_?"

Robin nodded her head proudly. "A bro always should, right?" They both had a little laugh. "Barney…you seemed really distracted earlier," Robin said, cutting to the chase. Normally, she would've kept joking around with Barney. She would've taken time to praise him after his Canadian comment because it's the first nice thing he's said about her homeland. But his disconnected feeling from the table earlier gave her this gut feeling that something was bothering her friend. She was right. He was breaking out in a cold sweat before her eyes. His chest was rapidly filling up with air and deflating.

"W-w-why do you say that?" his hand shook as he brought the foreign scotch up to his lip and took a relieving gulp of it. Taking his other hand, he wiped a section of sweat from his forehead.

"Even though you didn't go through with it, you were going to leave early. Way too early."

A million things went through Barney's mind in that moment. Robin saw the wheels spinning, so she decided to take a break from talking and enjoy her drink. The pieces of Barney's though process finally came together. Absentmindedly, his left hand traveled to the crook of his neck where the collar of his shirt was held tightly by his tie. He tied it tighter than usual this week because he became paranoid.

…

About a week earlier, Barney was fixing his shirt collar when he noticed a blemish the width of his thumb that he'd never seen. Figuring he'd had it all this time and didn't notice it, he ignored the blemish. It wasn't until he and Quinn were in the middle of their usual foreplay that it was pointed out.

"What's that mark on your neck?" his fiancé asked him as he was kissing her neck. He stopped and scampered over to the bathroom mirror with his shirt half off. Turning his head to the side, he examined the blemish once more. Quickly, he rushed into the kitchen like he was getting a glass of water. He remembered a picture of him and his mom was out in the living room, which was right next to the kitchen. After he got the water, he stopped by the picture. They were near a boat and his shirt was off. The blemish wasn't there in the picture. He gulped, knowing what this could mean. But he didn't want to alarm Quinn.

He told her it was always hidden by his dress shirts. She bought it and wanted to continue their foreplay. But for the first time since he could remember, Barney wasn't up for sex. He made his phone ring and played it off as Marshall and Lily having a problem with baby Marvin and he was part of the solution. Even though it didn't really make sense, she didn't question it as Barney ran out of the apartment.


	2. Falling

**Benign**

Chapter 2: Falling

Truth is, Barney planned on going to a doctor that day, but chickened out. He wanted to tell someone that he could possibly have a cancerous blemish. Even though it was still highly possible it was simply benign, his family history spoke of cancer. Especially on his mother's side. Barney stared into the Canadian scotch and decided to let Robin in on the secret hed been keeping for a week. After all, she was one of his best friends. Unlike Marshall, Lily, and Ted, Robin could keep her composure to news like this. But if she didn't keep her composure, Barney would blame the Canadian scotch for fogging his mental state about telling her.

"Robin…" he finally began after a few sober minutes of silence. He was just going to flat-out say it, but decided to show her instead. Leaning over the table, he loosened his tie and pulled the shirt collar down on that side. Robin didn't know how to react at first.

"What is that?" she whispered. Barney sat back down on his side of the table.

"A blemish. I noticed it last week and have been paranoid since. I know the chances are that it's benign, but…what if it's cancerous?"

His tone was low. Almost a mumble to Robin. And it was too serious. Robin had to let it ring through her head a few times to even register that it had been the voice of the legendary Barney Stinson that said those icy words. She simply sat back in her booth and stared at her drink. He was doing the same on the other side of the table. She heard a scoffing sound come from him. As his mouth gaped open, the muscles in his face contracted into a look Robin had only seen once. Whether it is metaphorically or not, Barney had always been afraid of falling. The look on his face made it seem like he was slowly losing his footing.

"My mom's side of the family has a history of cancer. And that appointment I said I had with Quinn tomorrow? It's really a doctor's appointment to check this thing out. Hell, I haven't told Quinn yet. Robin…what if?" he bit his lip and tried to continue. Gulping so harshly that a tear slid from his left eye. "What if…"

Robin moved to the other side of the table beside Barney. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb on his right hand as she loosely put her arm around him and gave his shoulders a squeeze. _This_, right here, is the reason why he needed Robin. His other friend would've either cried first or simultaneously with him. If he was going to cry, he needed to be the only one to cry. His comforter needed to be rock solid. He and Robin were the rocks of the group. Low self-esteem as children. Similar relations with their parents. They were wired the same. They knew what made each other tick. They knew what the other wanted verses what they actually needed. They were both smooth talkers. And Robin basically knew all the right things to say.

"Barney, I don't really believe in religion much…but I believe in God. And I believe God's given you enough hell in your life as a child Now that you're a man, you shouldn't be getting the brunt of a cruel beating... I never said I'd get married in a church, but if your tumor is really benign, I will. And I believe with all of my heart that it is. Listen, you're going to marry a _beautiful_ girl. You're going to have a few kids running around. You're going to be sitting on Marshall and Lily's front porch when you're old, watching your grandkids play. You're going to have the full package."

Barney sobbed heavily into Robin's shoulder during her entire speech, but heard every word. As she was holding him, Robin frowned. She knew that everything she told him about getting married, having kids, growing old with his significant other, she couldn't have. She knew she couldn't have, and didn't want, kids. But as she held Barney, she wanted that life for herself. Not only that, but she wanted to create that life for Barney. She knew she couldn't though. He was with Quinn now. If destiny wanted them together, destiny was flying solo on this one. Robin was too buried in her own thoughts to even see Barney now.

He lifted his head up and locked her eyes with his. As he spoke, his voice was dry and higher-pitched than before.

"Robin, promise you'll be there?"

She shook her head slightly to venture back from her subconscious thinking. "At your appointment? Sure."

He blinked a tear that traveled slowly down his cheek. "…I meant for the rest of my life."

The sides of her cheeks perked as she slid her hand from his shoulder to the back of his head. She nuzzled the side of her head with his and whispered, "Always."

…

Barney and Robin went to his appointment the next morning. He was already in the waiting room filing out a clipboard when she came in. Relief painted a canvas over his eyes as he scooted over to allow her room on the lobby couch. As he finished the paperwork and had handed it to the receptionist, Robin could tell the paperwork had been a distraction to keep his rattled nerves maintained. She brought up his wedding to keep his mind off being there.

"So, I'm invited to your wedding, right?" she asked, looking right at him. He scrunched his face as though he was shocked that she even had to ask.

"Of course! You're one of my best friends ever and my fellow bro. Why would you even ask?"

Robin shrugged and sat back in her chair. "I didn't think it'd be conventional for one of your exes to be at your wedding. I thought it violated the bro code."

Barney buried one of his eyebrows and laughed, cupping one of his hands over both of hers that were folded neatly on her thighs. "Robin, we've broken that code quite a few times before. Plus, I'll definitely be at yours, right?"

"If I ever do get married, yeah."

"Robin Charles Scherbatsky Junior", Barney started, giving Robin a good laugh at using her full name. "Who wouldn't wanna marry you? You're beautiful, charming, talented, great in bed", which also gave her a good laugh. "Anyone who wouldn't want to marry someone like you obviously doesn't know what they're missing. Any guy to reel in a catch like you is really, really lucky."

His little speech about her left Robin blushing slightly. One of the nurses called Barney's name. He and Robin both got up. He walked in front of her, but not before saying one last thing:

"And if I'm lucky enough…I'll be the guy you're walking towards on your wedding day."


	3. Timing

**Benign**

Chapter 3: Timing

They had to wait at least twenty-four hours for the doctor's phone call. In the midst of that time, they both needed to keep their cool, especially Barney. For the first time in forever, he fully engulfed himself in actual work. Making phone calls, filling out meaningless paperwork, emailing executives in other countries. He even paid attention during the mid-day meeting. Afterwards, he kept his mind juggling by watching a street magic show some kid was doing across from the bar. The kid showcased some of the magic Barney did from time to time and did an impressive juggling act with bowling pins. Barney watched that for a while before he decided to go have a drink and wait for Robin. It was almost time for him to get the call that could effectively change his life.

By the time Robin got there, Barney had already had a scotch. The two nodded at each other's presence, but didn't speak. They both downed two more in uncomfortable silence before his phone buzzed. Barney knew from the singular buzz that it was only a text. Still, it made his heart jump.

_From Lily: Hey, come over to the apartment early tomorrow. I have something for you._

Barney read the message over and considered typing a dirty reply. After all, Lily did invite him to the apartment early tomorrow because she _has something for him. _But tonight, he wasn't in the mood to do so. He typed a simple 'OK' and sent the message. Robin didn't even ask. In fact, Robin looked to be in her own little world at that moment. Then, the phone call finally came. Both of them came back to the reality sitting in front of them and paused for a second. Barney reached for the phone slowly.

"Hello?" Barney answered nervously, glancing over at Robin. Robin kept a calm composure incase Barney's results came back with bad news. She couldn't show how flipping nervous she was on the other side of the table.

"Barney, this is Dr. O'Brien calling about your test results." That sentence made Barney's hear jump from his chest. Dr. O'Brien paused on the other line, making all the blood rush to his cheeks. Her tone was also very serious. Then again, she had to keep a professional tone at all times, right? "It turns out that the blemish on your neck is just benign. No need to come in to discuss it. It's just a skin irritation that can be cleared up with some skin cream." No sooner than the doctor had said it was benign had Barney felt this overwhelming sense of relief. He thanked the doctor, hung up the phone and turned to Robin.

He licked his lips and drank a sip of his scotch. With his voice partially parched from his nerves, he talked in a raspy whisper. "It's benign."

Robin's mouth hung open as they got up and hugged tightly. Some short gasping came from both of them as if they just swam up for air after being under the water for so long. A tear escaped from each of them as they clung onto each other's shoulders for dear life. Finishing off their drinks while standing, Barney thanked Robin again for being there for him. They went outside together and then their separate directions. Barney back to his apartment and Robin back to work to cover a story about a hostage situation downtown.

…

Barney clicked his heels together with glee before entering his and Quinn's apartment. She had a long shift overnight at the club, so Barney had the place to himself. Though he loved Quinn to bits, he needed to be alone tonight. Tonight was going to be his night to celebrate. That blemish once again reminded him that he only got to live life once. He needed to make all of the right choices. And he already had one very big choice that he made that he hasn't shared with anyone. Not even Quinn.

Barney shook his head and came back to the present. His mind wandering wasn't going to help him celebrate the night away. He'd have enough change coming soon. Tonight, he was going to celebrate his old-fashioned way: get drunk, watch some high-quality porn and have sex when his fiancé got home in the morning. After hiring some decorators, Barney's apartment had been converted from 'Tinkerbelle's vagina' back to his old style. He stuck a frozen meal in the microwave and sung as he sauntered over to the couch.

"_I don't got no cancer. The tumor's benign. La la la. Barney's gonna live to see the next day," _he sung as he pulled his cell phone out to call Quinn. He continued talking in a sing-song voice and started narrating out-loud. _"I'm gonna dial a little number and let the girl I love know that I doooooooooooo." _As he held the last note out, he overlapped with the person on the other line and missed their greeting. During the whole call, he spoke so fast that he didn't even give himself room to breathe. "Hey, I just wanted to call to let you know how much I love you. Don't ask why I needed to call at the most random time of night to tell you, but I did. So, I love you. I love you. I love you!"

_Click._

And just like clockwork, his microwave beeped to let him know dinner was done. Barney, full of energy, jumped up and skipped to the kitchen. He was amused with just how ironic timing could be sometimes.

…

Someone on the other side of the city had the same thought.

Robin had just arrived on the set of the hostage situation. Another reporter had just given her the skinny on what happened as far as they knew. In front of a little drug-store downtown, cop cars swarmed the area. A gang-banger had reportedly tried robbing a convenience store with two teenage boys as his hostages. Robin was directed that they were going on-air in just a few minutes. Right after hearing this, her phone buzzed. It was Barney.

"Hello?" she answered before whipping the phone away from her ear. Barney was holding out a very loud and high-pitched singing note and probably didn't even hear her pick up. Then, he started speaking so rapidly that Robin didn't even get to speak.

"Hey, I just wanted to call to let you know how much I love you. Don't ask why I needed to call at the most random time of night to tell you, but I did. So, I love you. I love you. I love you!"

Before she could answer, _Click._

Robin was completely stunned. Why did Barney pick this specific time to call her? He knew she was going downtown and that there was a commotion…but why did he do that? Why'd he call to tell her he loved her right then and there? A finger from a cameraman was pointed at her to start broadcasting. Robin had to put the moment behind her and just focus on her work.

"Robin Sherbatsky here on the scene of a convenience store hostage. Two local teens are the hostages of the unnamed robber who held up the store about an hour ago. Police officials have the store surrounded in hopes that the robber will come out shortly and release the hostages."

She turned around to see if there was any progress before turning back to the camera. She was about to speak once more, but a riot from behind stopped her. Two gunshots had run out from the convenience store behind her. She instinctively ducked. The robber had bolted out of the stores and collapsed to the ground, his chest oozing with blood. He had shot himself in hopes to get himself out of this situation faster. He would've rather died than faced his consequences. All of this had been caught on camera.

As they stopped the broadcast, the two teenage boys ran out of the store and to Robin. She was the closest person to the door, so they ran to her hand clung on for dear life. All they needed was someone to hug. She was the first person they saw during their second chance at life. Robin held those boys for well over ten minutes as the robber's body was taken by ambulance. And then she had realized something. Those boys ran towards her because she was within close vicinity. If the robber hadn't shot himself, she would've been his next hostage most likely. This thought crossed her mind multiple times and struck her with terror. She thought of all the things she hadn't got to do yet.

The only thing Robin could think of positively were the last words ever said to her would've been _I love you_. Her best friend telling her that he loved her. It could very well just be one of Barney's infamous drunk calls, or it could've been sincere because of their situation the last couple of days. Still, it was like God had timed it to happen right before he broadcast on purpose. Last words are important. Getting told _I love you_ is possibly the best. It eased Robin's fears. But suddenly, she felt emptiness in her arms. The boys had left with their families. Robin was now all alone. Almost to the degree of feeling… _unloved._ And weirdly, she _hated_ that feeling for the first time in her life. Those children in her arms just felt right. Her comforting them just felt right. All of this felt right.

Did Robin Sherbatsky, for the first time in her short life, want children?

…

After his phone call, Barney felt pumped. The rest of his night would consist of porn, scotch, and a sense of freedom. One of his favorite concoctions. But as Barney was turning on his 300 inch TV, Robin was reporting downtown.

He saw it all. The gunman shooting himself and Robin holding those kids close to her. He tried shaking the thought that Robin could've easily been shot herself, but couldn't. Against what his manhood wanted, his heart and his brain overtook the dapper man. He just _had_ to see her. He had to hold her and know that she's alright. Though he knew she was, today especially taught him the importance of life verses death. He needed to hold her in his arms. Just like she did with those kids.

He texted Ted to come with him to pick Robin up. Ted, already way ahead of him, was waiting outside of his building in a cab within a few seconds. As they pulled to the lot of the store, it was blocked off. They saw the silhouette of Robin leaning against one of the cop cars. She was just staring at the store in deep thought. She also had a cigarette hanging out of her mouth. Ted approached her first, softly tapping her shoulder. When she turned around, she was visibly upset. Putting out her cigarette, Robin wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. Obviously a sign that she'd been crying. She always separated the professional with the emotional. Robin never mixed her emotions with her work, but this time was different. Ted pulled her into a strong hug and led her to the cab where Barney was leaning against it, waiting. He also gave her a sympathetic hug before helping her into the backseat where he was sitting. Ted sat in front and directed the cab driver to drop off Barney first since his apartment was closer to the scene.

"I bet that was scary," Ted said, turning around to talk.

"It was. Just a little," Robin answered quietly. Barney had an arm protectively draped over his friend. The space between them was non-existent as she kept snuggling into his shoulder. There was the faint smell of scotch and his cologne that Robin inhaled the entire ride. It calmed her. It made her forget all of the wrong in the world for just a split-second.

"You want one of us to stay with you tonight?" Ted asked. "I mean, you could always stay with me and Victoria. Our place is your place." Ted's smile was contagious to Robin. She couldn't help but crack one herself. And like the domino effect, whenever Robin smiled, so did Barney. But she shook her head.

"Nah, it would be weird. Considering…well, you know."

Ted nodded and turned back to facing the front of the cab. Bringing the girl he originally dumped Victoria for back to their new place wasn't exactly a smart move. They were in a good place now. Victoria was fine with Robin, but that would cross the line a little too far. But he wanted to help his friend. He wanted her not to be alone tonight. In fact, he was going to make sure of it. Before he could interject, Barney started talking.

"You know…Quinn's working all night. I got room for a fellow bro on my dream ship tonight," Robin snorted at Barney's synonym for bed. "If you're up for it, you wanna be my shipmate for the night?"

Robin had to go through a deep thought process. Last time she was in Barney Stinson's bed, they had sex. Plus, she was scared out of her mind. Scared Robin likes to make hasty, regrettable decisions. Well…maybe not regrettable, but the timing's just off. _Timing_, she scoffed to herself. As much as she'd love his company, Robin shook her head.

"Thanks, but I think I'll crash at Marshall and Lily's. Won't be sleeping tonight and I bet Marvin won't either," she chuckled, rubbing Barney's forearm and reaching her other hand to pat Ted's shoulder. "But thanks, both of you, for the offer. I appreciate it," she smiled.

But Robin had fallen asleep. Barney noticed her dozing off a couple of blocks back, but decided to let the little bird get a few moments of decent shut eye. She had a pretty rough night and deserved a little bit of tranquility compared to none. When they stopped up front, Ted opened Barney's door as he lifted her bridal style out of the car.

"You got her?" Ted asked, unsure of exactly how much alcohol Barney had that night. Ted hadn't touched a drink, but he knew that Barney must have had a few in his system. He could smell the mixture of scotch and Barney's cologne on Barney's coat as he helped him out of the cab.

Barney paused to look down at his sleepy friend. She was nuzzling on one of his arms and muttering in her sleep. He thought to himself, _man, she looks cute…minus the drooling. _Still, a small fraction of him even thought her drooling was charming. Smiling, he cuddled her closer without even realizing it and whispered to Ted, "Yeah…I got her."


	4. Soothsayer Marshall

**Benign**

Chapter 4: Soothsayer Marshall

Barney made it to the apartment safely with Robin still sound asleep. Without a free hand, he had to turn to the side to knock on the door with his foot.

"Who is it?" Lily asked, sounding a little bit alarmed. Barney checked his watch. It was pretty late for visitors he figured.

"It's Barney. I've got a sleeping Canadian that wants to spend the night." He had to talk loudly so Lily could hear him through the door. He hoped with all his might that Robin was a heavy sleeper so she wouldn't suddenly jolt out of his arms or accidentally kick his ticklish spot. He looked down at her and all she'd done was manage to drool like a St. Bernard on his jacket sleeve. Normally, Barney would've had a panic attack by now because to him, his suits were like his babies. But he made the exception this once. Robin was _always _the exception to his rules.

Marshall opened the door with Lily right behind him, nursing baby Marvin with a towel covering her bare chest. Barney's eyes immediately began to mentally undress the towel from Lily's breast. He raised his eyebrows with an intriguing glance.

"A place to sleep _and _a show. Sherbatsky sure lucked out tonight," Barney laughed, nodding his head to Lily. Marshall took Robin from Barney's arms and set her gingerly on the couch. Lily was about to scold Barney, but he held his hand up, looked her straight in the eyes and spoke before she could get a word out. "Relax, it's not like I've never seem them before. Marvin's a lucky dude." He laughed quietly before looking back at Marshall and Robin. He got a blanket out and set it on top of the sleeping Canadian, tucking the corners underneath her. "So, did you guys catch the news tonight?"

"Yeah, we were just trying to put Marvin to bed when we saw," Lily said. "Marshall and I were scared _for_ her."

"Man, Robin must've been scared pretty bad if she wanted to spend the night over here," Marshall said, walking towards Barney and Lily. "And she even has a gun."

"Well, I offered her my place too. But she said that she probably wouldn't go to sleep and that she could help with baby Marvin. Plus, I think she didn't want to make Quinn uncomfortable. I mean, let's face it…it's Robin and-…" He stopped talking abruptly. Marshall and Lily were standing in front of the couch, looking at Barney as he kind of strolled aimlessly around. He didn't wanna talk anymore, but he also didn't wanna leave just yet. He snapped his fingers, thinking of the perfect excuse. "Hey, you said you wanted to give me something tomorrow? Since I'm here, why don't you just give it to me now?"

"It's…it's not ready yet," Lily stammered, trying to keep Barney from becoming suspicious. She quickly glanced at Marshall. "I have to add a few things to it first."

"Okay…" He dismissed it easily, which confused Lily. Either he was completely clueless, or he knew she was lying.

Truth was Barney was just too tired and too worried about Robin to even care what Lily was hiding. Whatever it may be. The room became awkwardly silent besides Marvin's stirring in Lily's arms and Robin's soft snoring. Barney circumnavigated the entire living room before stopping by the window that led to the fire escape. It was open. Strange.

"You guys should really check your windows at night. I mean, what if there's a baby-napper on the loose or something," Barney joked, shutting the window for them. As he did, he swore he caught a glimpse of someone with blonde hair at the bottom of the fire escape, but decided that it was late and he was just imagining things. Little did he know that Marshall and Lily knew e_xactly _why that window was open. They just hoped that Barney didn't. Looking at his watch, Barney decided that his list of excuses was up. Now was as good of a time as any other to go back home.

"Well, I should give you guys the chance to put the youngster to bed and get some shut eye," he yawned, patting Marvin's soft head. Looking at Marvin was perfect irony of what he was thinking earlier. He had a plan. No, it wasn't stealing Marvin like his 'baby-napper' joked he cracked earlier, but it had to do with the little baby. He glanced at the tired baby one more before opening the door. "And uhhh…take care of that one, too," he pointed to Robin, grinned and left the apartment.

Marshall and Lily waved one last time to Barney and quietly turned off all the lights. They put their already sleeping baby to bed easily and tip-toed to their own room, shutting the door.

"That was _so_ close," Lily sighed.

"I know. I feel kinda bad not telling him why that window was open," Marshall said, getting underneath the covers and snuggling close to his wife. "And that's the longest you've ever kept a secret, baby. I'm so proud!"

"I know!" she exclaimed. They high-fived gently under the covers and snuggled close to each other, finding warmth and comfort. With their eyes closed, Marshall spoke.

"You're going to tell him tomorrow, aren't you?"

"The only thing I can't keep closed for long besides my legs is my mouth," Lily joked, turning to face Marshall and opening her eyes. Though the two have been tired from caring for Marvin, a spark they've held onto since they first met kept them awake and loving. Being in love with someone means that the spark never goes to the sleep. And neither does the couple. After a short round of sex, the pair fell sound asleep smiling like idiots.

To them, being in love was the cure to the sickness that is being in love. Though it doesn't make sense, people in love can tell you that it does. That's the concept that Barney, Robin and even Ted didn't quite grasp. It's a contradiction. It's an oxymoron. It's true, pure love.

…

Lily woke up first. The sun was shining through the window of the bedroom. As she laid there naked, she watched Marshall sleep and thought how cute he was. And how familiar it was. Marvin was definitely a dead ringer to Marshall when he slept. He even gurgled and stirred the same way.

_Marvin_, Lily thought, looking at her baby monitor in frenzy. _He didn't wake me up this morning._

All she heard was static. Not even Marvin's sleeping noises came through. Jumping right into maternal mode, she slapped her mate awake and put a robe on quickly. Marshall did the same and followed her to the living room where they saw an unusual sight. Robin had Marvin propped up on her knees. Both of Marvin's tiny hands were on Robin's cheeks. She put her feet on the coffee table and brought both her knees and Marvin closer to her face. She wasn't exactly cooing to him, but she was muttering some baby talk his way. And he loved every second of it.

Marshall ruined the moment with a sneeze. It made Robin jump a bit, but she gripped Marvin tight. Turning around, she laughed at Marshall's attempt to stand frozen in his place like a statue. He blinked and Robin laughed.

"Morning, love birds," she greeted. "See, Marv? Those weren't two bunnies going at it like mad that you heard last night. It was just mommy and daddy." Her voice jumped a few octaves higher.

"You heard us?" Lily groaned. Robin nodded vigorously.

"You didn't have to have super-sonic hearing to hear _that_," Robin stated, giving the two lovers a teasing look. "Besides, I needed a reason to get up last night. I must have dozed off on your couch when I first came up. I had a dream that was morphing into a nightmare. If you guys and Marvin's gurgling fit hadn't woke me up, I might've actually peed in my pants."

"What was the dream of?" Marshall asked, resting his fist under his chin. He looked fully intrigued.

"Oh God," Lily moaned, taking Marvin from Robin to change his diaper.

"What?" Robin chuckled.

"Marshall got this dream analyzer book at a garage sale and now he thinks he's a master at it," Lily called from Marvin's room.

"Shhhh, babe." Marshall sat in a prayer-like pose with his eyes shut. "I'm clearing out all of my thoughts for this." He stretched his arms out and opened his hands.

"Lily's boobs, there. Done." Robin laughed at her comment but shut up after Marshall gave her a look. And it wasn't just a regular glare, it was a smirk. Robin tried figuring out why he was _smirking_, but then she realized that Barney's inappropriate jokes were rubbing off on her. Lily came back into the room with Marvin, setting him on Robin's lap again and watched as her husband waved his hands around Robin, twiddling his fingers and making a wave noise.

All of that came to a halt as he grabbed the book and gingerly opened it. "Go."

"Well, I was on this train. This smell of scotch and cologne overtook my nose. It calmed me almost to a point of meditation. I followed the scent to this boat. I got off the boat because I thought I found the origin of the smell, but it was completely gone after that. Then, I was engulfed in darkness as a gunshot rang in the air. The bullets kept zipping past me and before I knew it, one struck me in the chest. I didn't even feel it. All I could do was hold onto the wound and watch my blood gush out. Footsteps came closer. I assume it was the gunman."

"Assume? Asked Marshall.

"Yeah, cause I woke up after that."

Marshall held a finger up for a moment to skim the book. As he was doing so, a look of discourage came across his face. "This may take longer than I thought. I'll tell ya later at the bar, sound good?"

Robin nodded as she handed Marvin off to Lily. "Sounds like a plan, Soothsayer Marshall. I have swing by my place to get ready for work. See you guys later." She knelt down before Lily to give Marvin a little tickle on his belly before leaving. She halted in the middle of the doorframe, remembering that she wanted to talk to Lily about something.

It wasn't just anything. It was about Barney's call from last night. Robin didn't exactly know what to do, so she went to her 'person'. That was Lily. "Lily?" Robin called.

"Yes?"

"Can I text you when I get in the cab? I need to talk about something, but I really need to get going. And it can't wait."

"Sure." Lily's tone hinted that she was concerned.

Robin grinned. "Thanks."

In route to leaving, Robin (literally) bumped into Barney in the hall. The both kind of chuckled and shook it off, apologizing to each other.

"Sorry," Barney muttered.

"No, I am. I should've had my eyes up."

"Lookin' downstairs, Sherbatsky?" Barney's inappropriate sense of humor was slowly uprising again. Robin playfully swatted him across the arm, trying to hide the blush that was uprising to her cheeks. "Kidding…so, you okay from last night?"He asked, putting his hands in his pants pockets.

Tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, Robin responded. "Yeah. But how come I don't remember going from the cab to Marshall and Lily's?"

"You zonked out in the backseat and used me a pillow _and _a drool bucket. So _I_ carried you up there."

Robin narrowed her eyes in on him. "_You _carried me up?"

"Yeah?" Barney meant for it to come out more like a statement than a question. "Ted was with me, but I offered. I owed it to you because of your kindness earlier." Barney was being sincere. Sure, he still carried over his legendary smirk while talking to Robin, but she kind of enjoyed this side of Barney. Problem is, sincere Barney and vulnerable Robin always spelled out an equation that always equaled sleeping together. Robin shook her head to ration her thoughts.

"Oh…" her voice dropped. "It's just that I thought…Anyway, you're welcome. And thanks…again. Not just for that. For everything last night. And if you see Ted before I do, thank him too. I appreciate what you guys did for me last night…"

Barney's mouth twitched up for a smile as he put his hand on Robin's arm and rubbed it. "Anything for a bro," he said, patting her arm before walking into Marshall and Lily's apartment. Marshall was sitting on the couch feeding Marvin a bottle as Lily tapped her foot impatiently.

"You're late, Stinson." Lily's tone carried the tone of a drill sergeant. It even made Barney wince.

"Sorry?" he said closing the door. "I thought we just said early. I didn't know there was a time." He sighed heavily, turning his attention to little Marvin and remembering his decision from earlier. "Hey. Little guy. How you doin', huh?" he cooed and stroked Marvin's belly with his index finger a few times before turning his attention back to Lily. "So…what did you need to give me?" Barney took a seat next to Marshall and Marvin and clapped his hands together between his legs.

"Advice."


	5. The good, the bad and the clear

**Benign**

Chapter 5: The good, the bad and the clear

"_Advice_?" Barney scoffed. "When you said you '_had something for me'_, I thought more along the lines of a tie for my wedding or some frilly bridal magazine to give to Quinn. Heck, I'd say a well-overdue look-and-feel with your honkers, but advice?"

Lily's nostrils flared. "Marshmellow, would you mind taking Marvin for a walk while I drill Stinson?" Lily's tone sounded sweet and high-pitched, but her teeth were clenched. A tell-tale sign that she was going to blow up in a matter of seconds. For Marvin's sake, she didn't want him hearing her yelling profanity. Marshall nodded without another word as he took the stroller and Marvin outside.

Barney contemplated making a dirty joke out of Lily's term for yelling at him. "So…you sent your boys out so you could _drill _me, huh?" This time, Barney took it one too far. Boy, if he didn't regret setting Lily off in the past, he sure did now. She _may or may not_ have left him a silver dollar sized mark on his arm. And Barney _definitely_ screamed like a little bitch.

"Don't make me use this again. I'll be aiming south next time. " Lily held up her hand. Barney nodded in understanding as Lily lowered her hand. She even lifted it an inch to see if Barney was being sincere. He flinched, which was her reassurance. Taking a seat next to him on the couch, the ambiance of the room had turned into a serious one. Barney sat stiff as a board, holding his 'injured' arm and Lily turned towards him speechless.

"So..." Barney had awkwardly begun, hoping Lily would start talking soon. She adjusted her spot on the couch and cleared her throat after a few more awkward seconds of quiet.

She didn't exactly know where to begin. But then, she thought of something. "Remember that fight you and Quinn had about five months ago?"

…

_(Five months earlier)_

_Barney had finished his business with Marshall at the bar. Paying the new bartender for the two drinks he had that night, he left with the papers in his hand. Normally, Barney's walk was a swinging saunter. Not too hoppy, yet not too slow or slummy. Today, Barney walked lacking the energy he usually strolled with. After a brief advisory session with Marshall at the bar, Barney made the decision to write up a prenuptial agreement for Quinn to sign that night. _

_He was worried that Quinn might be hurt by his decision to do so. But he was protecting his own butt. Barney had quite a successful stash of possessions. If things ended nastily with her, Barney wanted to be sure it was all safe. He may have been this ladies man the majority of his life, but he agreed that he only wanted to do this marriage deal once. It's too much work to have to do two and even three times. Once he took the dive, he wanted to stay in the water. He wanted the happily ever after that his mom never got. He was striving for his father's future and was going to follow his advice to the heart. He was going to marry the right girl._

_Going up to his door, Barney had actually calmed his nerves. It felt like the calm right before the storm. He opened the door to find his fiancé watching TV contently. She had a bowl of popcorn propped on her lap. After a brief hello follow by a peck on the lips, Barney sat down next to her and cut to the chase. Flipping through the papers, Quinn's face never changed. She was reading over everything carefully. Barney felt a wave of relief rush over his system as she smirked and set them back down where he originally set them._

_Barney clapped his hands together and looked at Quinn. "So, you'll sign?"_

_Her smirk continued as she touched his cheek tenderly. "Of course, snuggie-poo." Uh oh... "Yeah, let me just fly to Narnia, talk to Papa Smurf, and sleep with Doogie Howser so I can get a free boob job first."This was even worse than Quinn freaking out to Barney. Her sense of sarcasm was snarky and could sting. "I mean a prenup? What, you think if we get divorced that I want your stupid diamond condoms and that stormtrooper replica?"_

"_Wha-" Barney was without word. "I just…"_

"_Forget it," Quinn snapped, getting off the couch and opening the front door. "I'm not in the mood to talk about this. We'll settle it when I get home from work. Bye." Quinn was short with her words as she slammed the door on her way out. Barney sat in the same spot for over three minutes without so much as blinking. Picking up the documents, he jostled them in his hand and walked over to his briefcase, stashing them inside. _

…

Lily told Barney the whole truth. Quinn didn't go back to work after their quibble. She came to the apartment to vent to Lily about the prenup. She also came to get some advice from Lily on what to do. Not only on the prenup, but on more matters like the wedding. Barney figured out that even though Lily never outright said so, she was basically planning the wedding for them. Quinn just took credit.

"So…all this time? She's been coming here to you? She's been asking you to plan the wedding? You're the one who got her to sign the prenup?"

Lily nodded. "Pretty much. She's just as clueless as you are about getting married. The poor thing had no clue where to even start planning. You really think a stripper is one of those girls who plan their wedding by the detail for hours on end like I did?" Barney lowered his hands and tried imagining it. Quinn sitting on this very couch and Lily showing her some article from one of her trillions of bridal magazines she had for her and Marshall's wedding. Her pointing to something and giving her opinion that it's cute and Quinn nodding along, telling her to write it down to order. All of the things Lily was listing to Barney that she helped Quinn decide on were the finer details of the wedding. It made it a serious occasion. Barney may have a carefree attitude, but he didn't want his wedding being a joke to anyone like he himself was. He thought he sounded like a girl admitting that. After all this time thinking his fiancé had impeccable taste, it turned out to be Lily this whole time.

Her question rang through his head a few more times. _You really think a stripper is one of those girls who plan their wedding by the detail for hours on end? _Barney's intake on girls was that all of them, stripper or not, wanted their big day to be spectacular. And it's not like they didn't have the bucks to do it. Barney definitely agreed the first time they sat down after their engagement to pay for it himself. He sat back against the back of the couch and kept the conversation in his head still alive. _Like I did. _For once, Barney and Lily had one thing in common. If Quinn wasn't so sneaky and admitted that she didn't want to plan a serious wedding in the first place, Barney would've stepped up to the plate. He would've been Lily in that situation. He would've been the girl up in her room for hours at a time pasting things together.

There was no doubt in his mind that he loved Quinn. She was everything he'd _wanted_. But this newfound information created some friction in his mind. Did he really want a bride who didn't put their heart into it? And if she didn't commit full-heartedly to this, would she to anything? Their marriage? Their kids? But then he remembered another girl like Quinn. Another girl that didn't look into the finer details of a wedding. It was Robin. But at least Robin was serious about other things. Her work, for instance. Quinn's job required no amount of seriousness. Would she _ever_ be a serious person when he needed it? Barney hated to admit it to himself, but he needed a stability factor. Someone who could be rock solid. Someone who he could cry out his frustrations in front of.

Lily saw that Barney was in really deep thought, so she patted his arm. "I think you should talk to Quinn." That wasn't the advice she was going to give him originally. In fact, Lily was going to question whether he _really_ wanted to marry Quinn or not. But she could tell he was already questioning that himself. In a way, she felt responsible. She felt like she should do something to make Barney feel a little relief before he goes home.

"…You wanna look at my boobs?" Her tone lathered in sympathy. It took Barney out of his trance of thought. Laughing, he shook his head.

"Nah…but, thanks." He patted her thigh and got up. The time that Barney was there was about the length of the cab ride he took on the way over. Even if it wasn't a long talk. Sometimes, the most impactful moments happen in just the blink of an eye. Lily _did_ share a revelation that did some good. Barney could go home with a clear mind. Yes, it created some inner-conflict, but that's life. Life's just harsh like that sometimes. At times, it seems as if destiny wants you somewhere. Other times, it gives you a big slap in the face out of the blue. You're left defeated with no direction to turn to. And then there's a rare exception: You create the footsteps you're willing to take. The ones you _need_ to take.

And Barney took the steps he needed in that moment. Walking down the street to hail a cab, Barney closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. And he swears that, just for a second, he could smell the ocean and see a beautiful blond girl walking along the shore. The beat of a familiar tune started fading it, but he couldn't tune out the sign of the cab's horn. He opened his eyes and stepped into the cab, mumbling his destination to the grumpy and old driver.

Pulling out onto the street, Barney leaned over and tapped the cabbie on the shoulder, feeling perpetually chatty.

"What's your name?"

"Pete," he spat, stopping at the light.

"You married?"

"Nope."

"Divorced?"

"Nope."

"Had a girlfriend?"

"Nope."

"Ever been in love?"

"Nope."

"Well, it's certainly not because you don't have a _wonderful_ personality," Barney mumbled to himself. Pete grunted, but Barney couldn't tell if he'd heard him or not. Looking ahead, he saw the dilemma. The traffic turned out terribly. They were surely going to be backed up for half an hour at least. Still, Barney couldn't shake the feeling that Pete would still be as crotchety even if the roads were clear and paved with a bunch of Benjamin Franklins. The other side of the road looked clear. It's as if everyone wanted to get away from New York and not towards it. A little metaphor of commitment. Some people will impel as far from it as possible. Unfortunately, that's the avenue people take. Rather than facing the dark reality, they run away. They try getting out of town. They take the easy way out.

The traffic now was so backed up that Pete put the cab into park and took out a magazine. He even reclined his seat back so he was lying down. Barney's mind entered another philosophical field as he chuckled aloud.

"I'm marrying a stripper," Barney thought out loud, trying to grab Pete's attention.

"Cool?"

"But what if it's not? What if I'm making a bad decision? What if I'm supposed to marry someone else? It's like…having sex with or without a condom. With one, there's protection. You can't get an STD, you can't get the girl pregnant, and there's no worry. Without one though…it's just that much more fun. The risk is there. It keeps it alive. It's almost fearful, but you have to take the plunge. Life's full of those decisions. The good ones. The bad ones. The right ones. The wrong ones. The ones we _want_ for ourselves. And then the ones we _need_ for ourselves. So…by marrying Quinn, which one of those, or even two or three of those, am I making?"

"Between you and Miss. Destiny that rode with me earlier, you young lovers are driving me up a wall," Pete muttered loud enough for Barney to hear.

"That's just it. What if I'm supposed to marry whoever you're talking about instead of my fiancé? Will I ever know the answer to that for sure unless I take the plunge? Wait… was her name really Miss. Destiny?"

Pete nodded along, figuring that it'd shut Barney up faster, which it did. He unbuckled his seatbelt and tossed a fifty in the passenger seat. "Keep the change, Pete."

Barney got out of the cab and averted to the other side of the street without the slightest worry that he was going to be hit by some crazy driver. It was the clear street. He started jogging the rest of the way to his apartment. Pete scoffed, grabbing the bill off the seat and shoved it in his shirt pocket.

"Why do I always get stuck with the crazies?" he muttered to himself, flipping the page of his magazine.


	6. Barry

**Benign **

Chapter 6: Barry

_(As Barney's talking to Lily)_

Robin stood by the curb. Taking her phone out, she tried texting Lily about her situation with Barney last night. As it would turn out, Robin's phone was completely dead from not having a charger. Huffing, she stuffed it back in her pocket and crossed her arms. A few seconds passed before a cab became available to her. As she was giving the cabbie directions to her apartment, she stopped talking.

"On second thought, take me to the nearest coffee shop first."

The cabbie nodded and took the street before the one they were originally going to turn onto. Since Robin didn't get very much sleep last night, she needed a kick. American coffee tasted bland compared to Canadian coffee (even Barney agreed to that). Robin didn't really care at this point. She just needed something to keep her heavy eyelids from closing shut for just a few more hours.

Stopping at the coffee shop she and the others usually visit when they grab a cup, she told the cabbie to leave the meter running. Upon entering the shop, her eye caught a particularly dapper man in front of her. He was turned to the side and counting some singles out. He was tall, brunette and had a shirt on that made Robin's stomach churn. It couldn't be…

Destiny has a funny way of talking sometimes. All those years of hearing that from Ted must've finally gotten to Robin. Impulsively, she tapped the man's shoulder. He turned towards her a tad confused at first. Then, he smiled. It turned out to be Robin's secret crush from a few years ago.

"It's you…" he began awkwardly, bouncing his index finger up and down, trying to remember her name. Robin laughed.

"It's okay. I don't know your name either. Robin, by the way." She held her hand out politely. Gently, he took her hand and shook it with his empty one.

"Barry," he smiled. "It's finally nice to know your name."

"Same," she laughed. The two were so held up in their small-talk that it took the grumpy old lady behind them clearing her throat loudly to get them back into focus. Robin chuckled and gestured for him to make his order.

"Medium black coffee." "He turned back to Robin. "And whatever she's having."

"What?" Robin paused for a second. "I can pay for my own."

"Nonsense," Barry laughed. "I want to be a gentleman."

Robin smiled and leaned over to make eye contact with the cashier. "Same thing he's having."

The cashier rang Barry up and Robin waited by the pick-up stand for her coffee. Barry walked over and stood by her as the pair waited for their coffee. They made a little bit more small-talk before the girl making their coffee announced that it was finished. Barry grabbed both cups, writing something on one of them. Robin assumed he was labeling their cups for some odd reason. Maybe he had the girl put something in his. Handing her one of the cups, he pointed to the door.

"I gotta run. I'm running late. Catch you later?"

Robin nodded vigorously as he fled through the door. Once again she meets her not-so-secret crush and doesn't even get the chance to ask for his phone number. Sighing, she walks out the door herself and takes a giant gulp of her coffee. Three numbers listed by her thumb catch her eye. Taking the cup away from her face, she realizes that he put his name and number on the coffee cup before handing it to her.

She entered the cab happily and gave the cabbie the address to her place once more. They barely beat the traffic flow that was about to come.

"Do you believe in destiny?" she thought out-loud.

"Eh," the cabbie answered shortly. "Destiny's just a fancy word delusional people use."

"You know, I used to think that too. But things lately have been pointing in a certain direction for me. It's as if I'm supposed to be somewhere specifically. Like the coffee shop? I just ran into a guy I've had a crush on for years. And now I finally have his number. How crazy is that?"

"Very," the cabbie muttered unconvincingly. _Like you_, he thought to himself.

"Maybe Ted's right. My friend, Ted, always talks about this stuff. Maybe I'm starting to finally see his point of view. And…it's not half bad." The cabbie halted the cab right outside of Robin's apartment building. She paid him the amount and then leaned over the window. "I know there's a reason I rode in your cab today. It's part of destiny. Have a nice day…what's your name?"

"Pete."

"That's the second name I learned today. Take care."

She walked away without another word. The cabbie put his cab back into drive and muttered to himself. "All destiny's telling me is that I should've jumped off the bridge twelve years ago like I planned."

…

Robin finished work without a second cup that day. The electricity buzzing through her body from the morning gave her even a little more energy than needed. Instead of hailing a cab again, she actually jogged over to the bar after changing out of her work clothes. She stopped jogging and walked in through the doors, catching Barney pop a pill in his mouth before settling down next to him.

"What'd you just take?"

"Ibuprofen," he said plainly. Then he started laughing. "You were heavy." As Barney chuckled, Robin swatted him playfully on the arm once again before ordering herself a beer. "Guess what legendary thing happened to me today?"

Barney leaned back as her turned his torso towards her. "You didn't even need the 'wait for it'…wow, must've been huge."

"I met my secret crush at the coffee shop," she smiled, fidgeting with her hands on the table. "Isn't that great?" she exclaimed.

"Marvelous," Barney said with hazy eyes. Robin knew Barney didn't exactly love the idea of her dating other guys. Normally, she wouldn't have been acting so thrilled. But this was an exception. Finally, after all the years of wondering what his name was, she finally met Barry officially. Though he wasn't as thrilled as his choice word of _marvelous_ suggested, he put on a genuine smile for his friend. It made her happy. And Robin could tell it was genuine when Barney flashed both his upper and lower teeth without effort.

Within a ten minute period, the rest of the group showed up minus the exception of Lily. Marshall gave an explanation.

"Marv and Lil aren't feeling too well, so they're home asleep. Well, Marvin is anyway. It's Lily's first period since she gave birth. Did you know that the uterine wall sheds two to three times longer than a regular period? True story."

Ted and Barney looked at that moment like they would rather climb up each other's asses and die than hear, and imagine in detail, what Marshall just said. Robin slightly smirked to herself. Though she was still not happy about never having kids, pregnancy and the after effects were something she glad she was able to dodge.

"If I throw up, Marshall Eriksen, not only will you be paying for my dry cleaning bill to infinity and beyond, but you will also be responsible to pay the hospital bill when a doctor has to remove my foot from your ass." Barney shook his head and shuddered. A scotch was just delivered to the table by a cute, young waitress. She was new at the bar. And this was the first time either Barney or Ted had ever seen her. "Thanks" was all Barney had said without so much as looking at the hottie.

"_Thanks? _That's all you managed to say was _thanks_?" Ted's voice was a cocktail of shock and even a little bit of disappointment.

"Should I have said 'Thanks, Tris'? Cause that's what her nametag said." Barney sighed and took a drink of the alcohol. The flavor coated his tongue and put the rest of his mind at ease for the moment.

"Dude…even though you're engaged, you still hit on chicks. You still wink at sluts that walk into these very doors, use perverse pickup lines on college girls, and hell, you even give Lily and Robin a good observation from boobs to ass."

It was unlike Barney to do so, but he snapped at Ted. "I just don't feel like it!" He wasn't loud, but Barney's aggravated tone caused the bar to quiet for an awkward second before resuming its normal pace. Grimmicing, he took another gulp of his drink and quenched every drop of it as it made its way down his throat. He put it down on the table with both of his hands still wrapped around it.

"Dude, what's the matter?" Ted leaned towards Barney who was eyeing his scotch as if his life depended on it; blinking rapidly before getting up, releasing the cup and mumbling behind his shoulder.

"Come to the bar with me." He took a few stiff strides forwards before Ted followed him. Ted shared a look between Marshall and Robin, who were both just as lost as he was. Still on her first beer, Robin took a short swing of it.

"So…you do anymore reading on that dream I had?" Robin said, breaking the silence.

"Yeah," Marshall laughed. "And it turns out…you're a lesbian."

Robin crossed her arms, clearly not amused by his joke. "Way to rip off a Dane Cook bit you plagiaristic bastard," she laughed. It lightened up the dark cloud over the table for the moment being. "But seriously."

"On serious terms? Umm…well, according to the first symbol in your dream which was the train. And the text said-" before Marshall could get the sentence out, a ruckus was heard behind them. Turning around, they saw Barney slamming his fists into the bar, his face red as the maroon tie he was wearing. Even the vein in his neck was popping out.

"Just leave me!" Barney choked in mid-sentence, storming out of the front entrance of the bar. This set the barn quiet for a straight minute. Not one person moved. The two people in the room who looked the most shaken up were Ted and the bartender he was teasing Barney about just a few moments ago. Ted made the first move that slowly brought the bar back to its normal pace once again. Marshall and Robin craned their necks to their friend who was sitting at the end of the table.

"Quinn broke off their engagement."


End file.
